“The show was indeed good,” she said to me, as we walked out of the theatre, “they acted so well!”
‘They ‘Acted‘ she said! … I paused to ponder. It brought a spark to me. Her words resonated with inner meaning. We appreciate good ‘acting’, good ‘lines delivered’ and good ‘performance’. Indeed, we pay to book our tickets to watch the ‘acting‘.
Isn’t this a fact in our real life too? Lalan, the fakir, sings..
O mind tell me
How many ‘I’s live in this body?
Someone paints a rosy picture
Someone colors himself in these colors
And another destroys the colors
To a naught
How many I’s live in this body?
..mumbling to myself, I walked on – oblivious of everything happening around. ..”tomar ghore boshot kore koy jona..”
Isn’t this all of us do, or expected to do? To my father I am the daughter, to my child, I am the mother; to my spouse I am the partner, to my friend I am a friend…various roles, various role plays….some to be acted at the same time, some to be acted after a while. And like the theatre actors, we aspire to play all roles to perfection. That alone will give us accolades. We have these roles to perform, yet… the funny part is, we super impose one role on the other… !
Irritated by the parents or the parents-in-law, we bring forth our irritation on the children. We all know this, some of us do this and feel miserable for being nasty to the cute darlings. Yet it happens ! Irritated by the boss at work, we express our anger on the people at home, who in no way remain responsible for the reaction we bring out. From one reaction to another, from one face to another, we migrate. In the process, the break that we ought to give, for perfection of the role, is quite ignored.
Wait, …did I say perfection of the role?
Are we expected to be perfect in everything? After all, we are human!
I’ve heard this ever so often! True, we are not expected to be perfect, ‘to err is human’ they say. But that does not take away the ‘role’ that is imposed on us at a given time. Call it fate or destiny, call it nature or God …at a given point in time, there are numerous roles that each one of us is expected to play. The father is also the grandfather, the daughter is also the mother. The admixture (khichdi) might not be quite palatable, but identifying each role individually, and living it to the best that can be done at that point, can be do-able.
The actor cannot remain confined to a single role 24*7*365 ! That would ruin the entire creativity. The play over, the role is over. Unfortunately, in real life, this play extends a little more. But nevertheless, there are periods of break in between, the phase where we can identify ourselves just as we are … not a daughter/ son, not a husband/ wife,…not as father / mother.. but just the person one is. Accepting this part of oneself is ever so essential. This is the stress-free zone, where no one is associated with ‘me’.
Once one is attuned to this ‘me-zone’, all roles thereafter are performed to desired perfection. The badminton player accepts, responds and plays from all corners of the court, but keeps to the center for the best results. The opponent can easily dislodge the player and win a game, if the center is left unguarded. So too, our center is we ourselves, sans all relations, all belongings, without all role plays and all associations. Every corner of our life is important for our flexibility and proper response, but the center – the ‘me-zone’ – the ‘mask – free- me’ remains the vital core.
No matter how many ‘I’s function, depending on the roles we play, the ‘me’ in all this – is easy to identify with, this is someone we truly cherish, appreciate and love.
My friend had given me a wonderful insight, with just a comment. Masters call it Grace.